"When I write stories I am like someone who is in her own country, walking along streets that she has known since she was a child, between walls and trees that are hers." --Natalia Ginsburg

Sunday 24 June 2012

Embracing Love



“Something of God... flows into us from the blue of the sky, the taste of honey; the delicious embrace of water whether cold or hot, and even from sleep itself.”
― C.S. Lewis
Last Monday was a long old day. I had decided the week before that it is time to move on. I will be looking for a live-in Nanny’s position to start--Lord willing by September. I have Online College courses I need to finish and I am unable to meet the demands of running a house financially and pay for my education.
After much prayer and contemplation, I finalized my decision last weekend and let my immediate family know. On Monday, I told the families I work for, and also told my youngest niece and nephew. The day was long and tiring emotionally. When the children left for the day there was a welcome stream of friends and family, and by 10pm my body was begging for sleep--my mind begged for something more—solitude perhaps? I turned out all the lights in the house and made a cup of tea and went out in the fading night and sat on my front deck.
As I sat there I listened to the breeze soughing through the trees and could smell the soft scent of the blooming peonies carried on the same breeze. I could hear the geese in the pond across the road singing a dubious duet with the bullfrogs. Stars shone in the indigo sky and the trees that circle the pond were silhouetted in the stillness of the water. As I sat there I sighed, thankful for the tranquility. I noticed a flicker of light in my neighbor’s blueberry field, and then another and another---I laughed softly with delight—dozens of fireflies twinkled in the evening---the first fireflies of the summer.
….And something of God flowed into me…..
In their book ‘A Sacred Romance’, authors Brent Curtis and John Eldridge write about the greatest romance of all time---God’s love for humanity, and His earnest desire to have a personal relationship with each of us. On page fourteen Brent shares his first memory of The Romance. As a young boy he would run through a cornfield in the early evening to a creek on his family’s property--there, his senses were filled with the scents, sights and sounds of the world around him. When I read that, I immediately remembered kneeling at my bedroom window as a young girl in the gathering twilight and the fullness that filled me from the tip of my toes to the top of my head. (I wrote about this in ‘Joy-My Cup Runneth Over’). I didn’t have words for it then, but I recognize now and acknowledge that before I chose to know God, He was there, calling me to Himself and filling my heart with His love through this breathtaking world He has created.
It is so easy to get caught up in the busy-ness of the day, and the stress and sorrow that life brings, and even the relentless noise and clatter of all of life’s conveniences, (including this laptop I am tapping away on). As I write, a bouquet of wild roses grace my windowsill…..picked yesterday after a soft rain, their scent mingling with the peace I have in my heart. God loves us and blesses us every day with the beauty of His creation. I am thankful, when life is too distracting, to be drawn into these moments with the One who loves me best and most.

No comments:

Post a Comment